To: Neurotic Parents Attending Sesame Street Live Last Weekend
Re: Conduct
I witnessed a fair amount of rude and obnoxious behavior that has no place in TODDLER RELATED group events as the one referenced above. As a public service, I would like to provide you with some guidance for any similar events in the future.
- Don't try to be sneaky and STEAL better seats just because they appear empty. Someone will invariable show up, you'll have to move during the performance, thereby disturbing everyone else around you. Give me a break - you're holding a 16 month old on your lap to see a fuzzy red monster that your tot can barely focus on. This isn't a U2 concert where you rush the stage, you boob.
- At intermission when your kid is screaming for show-related schwag, just BUY HIM SOMETHING, please? Those of us around you don't want to hear your well-intentioned though misplaced attempts to teach your child fiscal responsibility. Sure the prices are outrageous. Yes, your child will ditch the item the minute you get home but you bought the show tickets and you signed up for this. Own it. Souvenirs are part of the gig and it is not the time to rationalize with a child who is having a seizure because you won't buy him an Elmo balloon.
- When ascending the 8,000 steps up from floor level to the main concourse, please be vigilant of those behind you and any bottlenecking you may be causing. Your insistence on letting your 13 month old "walk" up the steps him/herself holding your fingers is not even close to "cute" in that element. The person behind you might be carrying a 40 lb child of their own. And they might be eight months pregnant. And they might be seeing stars from the physical exertion of both. Be a little more courteous please.
- Don't cut in line in front of me at the souvenir stand then insult my intelligence further by acting like you've been there all along and that I wouldn't notice. Take your Blackberry-headset-talking, Coach-purse-wearing, Westlake-dinner-plans-making self to the back of the line where the rest of us started. Also? My kid could so totally beat up your kid. See item 3 - 40lbs, remember.
3 comments:
Sesame Street Live - you should expect kids. And I would even expect obnoxious parents.
Try The Lion King with children under the age 10 who are complaining that there's too much music, bouncing around on their plastic rent-a-booster and making scritchy noises that crawled up my spine, as well as those who brought an infant that started crying and then still don't leave.
Your instructions need to be posted in a more public place so obnoxious parents can be made AWARE.
Make no mistake. My issue is not with the kids - only parents that know better. The kids behaved 100 times better than the parents around me...
heeeeyyy, where'd my comment go?
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